I just wish I could start a relationship about twelve years in, when you really...– Liz Lemon
What's a good stress relieving activity?
I’m so fucking wound up these days. You’d think writing and running would be two great ways to blow off some steam but somewhere along the lines those became major contributers to the problem as a whole. I want to like…go somewhere where you break glass on people. Or maybe yoga.
It gets WORSE
Who else is on the “Alice” soundtrack? All-American Rejects Metro Station Mark Hoppus and Pete Wentz (?) Motion City Soundtrack Plain White T’s You know what? I won’t bullshit you. I own music by all of those artists. And “Gives You Hell” is FAR to high on my iTunes Top 25 most played songs of all time. But for THIS movie? Inappropriate.
azizisbored: What Paul said. Amen. paulscheer: This is one of the best things I’ve seen in a long time. Check out this ridiculous violent and amazingly insane intro video for an Alaskan College Hockey Team. This is most violent polar bear I’ve ever seen. Ohhh wow. I don’t want to spoil it for you but a polar bear DOES blow up the earth.
What is my ex-girlfriend up to?
She rarely uses Facebook. She does not update statuses or change her profile picture. Her newsfeed is fairly stagnant. She comments on someone’s photo here. Somebody posts on her wall there. It’s just…I don’t get it. How is she living life? And how is she not more active on facebook. This is no longer a college dormroom obsession that you grow out of. It’s a way of...
WORD OF THE DAY
evince \ih-VIN(T)S, transitive verb: To show in a clear manner; to manifest; to make evident; to bring to light. EX. “My wife was able to evince my addiction to child pornography while going through my internet browser’s history”
Your dog is not a person. Don’t get all uppity when other people don’t treat it as such.
Happy 173rd Birthday Michigan! →
fuckyeahmichigan: Michigan became the 26th state on January 26, 1837.
Tonight seems like a good night to stay in, eat hot dogs, watch TV and pretty much wallow in self-loathing.
Somehow I manage to have the worst luck when it comes to finding healthcare in this town. Is it LA? Are a majority of the medical professionals in LA fucking LUNATICS? Most recently I went to the dentist who referred me to a plastic surgeon for cosmetic rhinoplasty. I went to his Yelp! page and the image that comes up is the injury sustained by the ex-girlfriend he was found guilty of assaulting...
Sorry to be repeating the story all over, but my dentist DID just tell me I needed a nose job, then proceeded to call a plastic surgeon and hand me the phone. Also he says I grind my teeth. Of course I do! It’s stress! Due to my hideous nose!
How lucky can I be to have two such passions. Show business and animals....– Betty White accepting her Lifetime Achievement Award.
LA Improv Relief Week
LA Improv Relief Week is from Sun Jan 24th – Sun Jan 31st . The Groundlings, Second City, IO West, and UCB are all doing various things throughout the week to raise funds to help with the devastating situation in Haiti. Aside from taking cash donations all week The Groundlings will be doing a whole special lineup of shows on Thursday night where all proceeds will go to UNICEF. That’s all the...
I am allowed to be cold when it is 45 degrees, rainy, and I have a body acclimated to warm weather. I am fully aware that your winter is colder than mine. I NEVER SAID IT WASN’T.
If you like Miley Cyrus, Gabourey Sidibe, and the sound of my voice, come see me do Not Too Shabby at UCB tonight at midnight.
Word of the Day
prevaricate \prih-VAIR-uh-kayt, intransitive verb: To depart from or evade the truth; to speak with equivocation. ex. “I found myself having to prevaricate under oath while on trial for the murder of ten children.”
did…The Office just do a CLIP SHOW episode?!?!?!?!?! Wow.
WORD OF THE DAY
Here’s a new thing I’ll do! I get word-of-the-day emails but I always feel they just go in one ear and out the other…and I’m not ABSORBING them. I’m not APPLYING my newfound knowledge. So every day I will tell you all the word, then use it in a sentence! Today’s word….BIBELOT bibelot \BEE-buh-loh, noun: A small decorative object without practical...
wordsbycodi: The UCB Theatre is doing its part to help the victims of the devastating earthquake that struck Haiti on January 12th, 2010 with a special fundraising edition of ASSSSCAT. Every dollar raised at this show will go directly to Mercy Corps and will be used to help those in Haiti affected by the destruction. I’m not sure who will be performing or who the monologist will be, but does...
I've got insurance
And I’ve got dental coverage. So damn fucking STRAIGHT I’m gonna pick a dentist in Beverly Hills.
I think that text messaging has made students believe that it’s far more...– Columbia University English professor Eleanor Johnson in Voice of America (via go) (via glamsoda) I always use proper grammar and spelling in my texts. Why? Because I’m not a 12-year-old girl on instant messenger.
Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus →
wordsbycodi: whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa?!!!!!!!!!!! szzzzlaga: I am so mad at EVERYONE right now for not telling me this existed. AND it stars Debbie Gibson and Lorenzo Lamas. Get out of here with that mess.
Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus →
I am so mad at EVERYONE right now for not telling me this existed.
SITE OF THE DAY →
Learn your damn homophones!
i'm pretty sure this is why i can't get into... →
joeliscool: the average game broadcast shows 11 minutes of actual gameplay and 67 minutes of people standing around. “In other words, if you tally up everything that happens between the time the ball is snapped and the play is whistled dead by the officials, there’s barely enough time to prepare a hard-boiled egg. In fact, the average telecast devotes 56% more time to showing...