Does anyone else remember the Carmen Electra and Dave Navarro reality show on MTV, and more specifically the episode where Dave was leaving to go on tour for like a month and wanted Carmen to kiss him goodbye but she was super stoned and giggly and kept singing lines from “Hey Ya” by Outkast and he was getting SUPER pissed?
"Today, I visited my boyfriend’s house excited about the romantic night he promised me. As time passed, we started making out and heading up to his room. Rose petals and candles filled his room. "How romantic", I thought. That is, until we saw his 5 year old sister blowing up condom balloons. FML”
I can hear my roommate fucking his girlfriend from down the hall in the living room with the TV on and the dishwasher running.
This happens weekly. I wasn’t sure how to address the fact that I don’t want to hear them fuck. I thought about a loud knock on my bedroom wall but then it’s like I’m communicating with them mid-coitus and that makes me want to vomit.
Conclusion? I’m going to buy a muzzle from PetCo, leave it at his door and say “For Susan.”
“About a week ago, I wrote “Once Upon A Time…” on the bathroom wall. When a returned to the stall I found the wall had been filled with a story about a dragon and a lamb becoming friends. IMMD”—(via IMMD)
“A couple of weeks ago when i was babysitting this little girl, we were playing with her stuffed animals and when i asked what the name was of one of her pink stuffed bears, she shamelessly answered “Bearslut”.”—(via IMMD)