I NEVER hang up when someone accidentally dials me without realizing it. I listen to whatever they are doing until they realize they butt-dialed.
I can’t tell my mom I had sex before marriage. She has diabetes.– Overheard at Chipotle.
Luckiest kid ever, in my opinion. →
This is a very divisive issue, and it is time that I express my true feelings on the matter. I LOVE the orange/citrus flavored toothpastes.
For example, there are 375 voting members in the directors branch. The...– This is how Oscar nominations work.
Great Urban Race - LA →
Meredith is my teammate. Who else wants to join???
Study finds troubling pattern of Southern... →
For personal reasons unrelated to this I have been eyeing a June 2008 departure from LA. This doesn’t do much to convince me otherwise.
I’m fairly certain I don’t need to blog about yesterday because no matter how hard I may try I will never ever forget a single detail.
Why would I care about her home loans?!?– My friend Lauren, in 2003, when Catherin Zeta Jones won an Oscar. A pregnant Ms. Jones said “My hormones are going crazy!” Lauren thought she said “home loans.” (Quote of the century)
I try to never post two negative posts in a row. And I just did that tonight. Just now. I apologize.
I don’t care who or what was nominated for an Oscar and none of you are going to guilt me into caring. I’m just as cultured as you. It’s just that I don’t happen to enjoy four hour ceremonies that celebrate montages and gowns more than talent or artistic merit and despite being called an AWARDS SHOW allot less than 5% of the run time to actual acceptance speeches. If I...
Tonight for dinner I am having a serving of instant mashed potatoes. In order to give myself more sustenance, I am considering putting it on bread.
For here or to go?– Guy at Coffee Bean, after ringing up my order of fifteen drinks.
Jess talking about being forced to get work done at the library made me think about how impossible it is for me to get any writing done at home. I think I’ll start going to the Panera or Starbucks around the corner where my distractions are limited to internet and homeless people. That may seem daunting, but cutting the DVR out of the equation will make a HUGE difference. Obviously I...
Hey so remember when I tried to be responsible and use my first paycheck to pay off lots of my bills? Looks like I paid too many of them, and now have -3 dollars to my name until next Wednesday. Oh. Fuck. Lucky for me, I’ve been dirt poor for some time now, and my body is not accustomed to eating food anymore anyway.
Hey, Happy "Most Miserable Day of the Year", y'all →
Despite my distaste for Los Angeles, it is important that I remember it is still possible for me to have fun. Fun does not necessarily mean I am compromising myself or selling out. I can hate this city but still enjoy what is has to offer. This weekend I did just that. I went and saw a few Groundlings shows, hung out with friends, saw My Bloody Valentine 3D (really fucking cool), did the...
Tix and Hurrcutts
Between the CHP, state of California, and city of Long Beach, someone does NOT want me to pay my speeding ticket, as every time I call or try to do so online, it tells me there is no record of this ticket. Fuck. This. Also, I’m getting a haircut. Now that I have money and my hair is too goddamn long, I am lopping it all off. Yes. I can’t wait to not need to comb it and to not feel...
8:40am on a Saturday and I have to go make a run for work.
There are three types of people that intimidate me most. Men that are taller than me. Large black women. Anyone pregnant.
The Wrestler, Slumdog Millionaire, Doubt, Frost/Nixon, etc… I have not seen ANY of these, as I have dubbed them, “Oscar” movies. I saw half of Benjamin Button and fell asleep on accident. Note to self…once I get money, see more movies. And maybe get NetFlix back.
I feel like I pooped more at my old job than I do at my new job. Probably too early to draw any substantial conclusions, but an interesting theory nonetheless.
I really love all of my UCB friends and I always have fun hanging out with them. However, something needs to be done about this staying out ridiculously late on weeknights situation. Didn’t get home until 1:30 last night, and I am currently in an early evening one-hour-and-twenty-minutes-left-I-swear-to-god-it’s-been-5:38-forever-lull. Such a lull, in fact, that I am drinking a pop...
Don't Touch That →
How the fuck am I supposed to go to the DMV if they no longer have Saturday service?
The Imodium website has a public restroom locater.... →
My new obsession is texting pictures and videos to people. I fucking love picture texts. I even got my mom picture texting. Now I know how much snow is on the patio table back home.
I’m writing a screenplay about hot dogs.
The lady will be having the tasting menu, but with some substitutions: Instead...– Jack Donaghy, 30 Rock (via maniacalrage) (via lifeofbk)
Made it through my first week of work and I don’t hate it yet. That’s some sort of accomplishment.
Whoa. Twelve hour turnaround. I worked until 11pm tonight which means I don’t have to go back until 11am tomorrow. Not bad.
Good news: I get to leave the office at 5 today! Bad news: I get to leave the office at 5 today in order to go to a shoot, where I will be until midnight!
re: my advice on men
christinahaberkern: carlovely: let them come on to you. let them come on to you.
I need Ellen tickets for my cousin. Doesn’t matter when, it could be in September. It could be tomorrow. I just need them. Someone help me.
Today was the first time it truly felt like Fall in LA. Yes. Today. January 6th.
Last night I made pasta for five other people. One of them spent the entire night puking. But the other four really liked it.